Bad movie, great film, Ricks the fascists.

It's been a week up here on Raptor Ridge, what with trying to train the magpies, watching movies in town and being frightened by the news.

The problem is, magpies are so damn smart. The other day there was an article about pigeons doing higher math. If pigeons do math, magpies do quantum mechanics. Magpies make pigeons look like bird brains. These clever feathered foragers in their bold black and white communicate complicated ideas verbally to each other and I think they've got a side deal going with the crows, too.

Last night I went to see "Real Steel." If I had paid more than $3 I would have walked out. Maybe I should have walked out because I only paid $3. Great price, horrible film. Formulaic, derivative, manipulative.

Oh, wait. Here is where I have to give a moment's consideration to those who question my audacity in judging a movie...

There. That ought to do it.

"Real Steel" featured Hugh Jackman's biceps, Evangeline Lilly's weepy smile, and Dakota Goyo's ability to show 'tude. There was no acting. For storyline I think the writers got loaded and slurred out "Rocky meets Iron Man!" In spots you can overhear the director demand of the key grip, "get camera on tears of joy, here, now."

Though I did really like their truck.

But tonight, the hangover from that awful movie was washed away by "The Wall." This film was written by Pink Floyd's Roger Waters, and with no dialogue is a tale of abandonment, self absorption, loss... the seeds of fascism ... yeah, ambitious. But the movie has held up rather well over the decades.

And I didn't even get a flashback from the music.

Oh. Speaking of fascism: The Ricks.

Rick Perry wants to attack Iraq again, and take their oil. I know. It must be something in the water down there in Texas. Bush was dumb enough, but Perry is just stupid. We just go the troops home after spending a hair less than a trillion dollars on George W's war in Iraq. I don't know how much we spent on George H.W.'s war in Iraq, but wars haven't been cheap in quite some time.

Now Perry wants to go back and fight both Iraq and Iran!

Somebody please tell him to shut up and go back to giving great health care to the children of Texas.

It is not a good sign for America that manufactured political packages like Perry or Bush (and yes, it started with movie actor Reagan) can be created and presented as if they were real people with real ideas. Manchurian candidates, Chauncey Gardiner, I don't know, my mind must be on movies.

And that brings this bramble ramble to the other Rick, Santorum. He is more dangerous than Perry, because he is twice as smart. Where the men coincide is that each is a zealot. Perry is a zealot for cowboyism, which is opposed to communism and capitalism, but we won't go into that here.

Santorum is a religious zealot, and as we see with extremist Muslims, that is the most worrisome kind, because they believe God blesses all that they do. It isn't just their opinion, it is God's, and whatever they do is justified, by definition.

Which gives Santorum the right to say gay people are godless. To say gay people should not love children, or can't, I am not sure, but in any case, if gay then remain marriageless, childless. To equate being gay to bigamy, as if it were all about sex.

It is interesting that in speaking of marriage, Santorum does not speak of love. But, maybe that's because love transcends the laws of man. Or sex is to be only in the service of God, as his church maintains.

I accept that Santorum and his wife slept with a dead fetus and then took it home so their other children would welcome it into their family. That would not have been my choice on many levels, I accept that it was theirs. But Santorum, like other religious zealots, thinks his values should be mine, and I don't want to live his life.

And unless the government is giving handouts to health industry corporations that paid Santorum millions of dollar to lobby for them, he's not much for public healthcare, either. Your church will provide, your neighbors, and that will be good for America. So his zealotry is mixed with hypocrisy, too, and maybe with a bit of bigotry thrown in.

Santorum wants to bring Catholic extremism to America. Like Sharia law in Saudi Arabia, and maybe soon in a few other places we wish were a little more ... secular.

Yes, there is a boiling and often irrational (on both sides) disagreement in America over individual freedoms, individual responsibilities and the role of government in society. But this needs to remain a philosophical and political discussion, not a moral or religious one. Or we are in trouble, because religious wars are always bitter and never settled.

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion ..."

In one of the last scenes in "The Wall," jack-booted soldiers use their moral certitude to condemn, pillage and destroy. We fight that when it is Muslim extremism (and not in our self interest, when we tolerate it). But we need to be vigilant, here, too.

The Ricks are bad men. They do not care about the lives of others. The American People have embraced zealotry before, but rejected it when our common good was in danger. That time is now. We don't have the luxury of giving the Ricks more stage.

Please pass the popcorn.